| The Rules Of Rewards |
| Though rewards and bribes aren't inherently bad, You should use them wisely. Children who expect a reward for every task that they complete are are bound to be frustrated when prizes don't appear, or think that unrewarded activities aren't worth doing. Here are some guidelines to help you keep the treats under control. Praise is often reward enough. Young children are highly motivated by a parent's recognition and approval. Giving your child affection and generous verbal praise for cooperative behavior can go a long way toward encouraging more good deeds. Recognize exceptionally good deeds. If your child has just spent an entire morning running errands with you with few complaints or upsets, a reward is appropriate. Use incentives, not bribes. Bribes usually arise out of desperation. You promise your toddler a new toy if she sits still at the restaurant, for example. An incentive, on the other hand, marks consistent progress, encourages kids to change their habits for the long term, and is agreed upon in advance rather than negotiated in the moment. Use the right-size rewards. If you're asking for your child's cooperation at bathtime, for example, an extra story when she's done is an appropriate prize. Promising a new toy the next day is too far removed and unrelated to the evening activity. |